Skip to main content

control - tell or ask?

Every creature needs to feel as though it has control over its life.  When we train animals, or even manage our pets at home, the most common statement out of people's mouths when the plan goes awry is that 'they know what to do'.  So we stand firm and dig our heels in and actually, great stats re in favour of the fact that the animal is confused and does not know what we want.  If our relationship has more control than it should, then the animal is probably even in a state of stress trying to please us.  And yet we believe they should do as we telepathically insist - we do this in life too.  Expect all sorts of things without communicating carefully. 

Much easier to go back a step and explain.  But to do that, we have to put down our need to be right.  Because it would mean that we have not communicated carefully in the first place - which is our own personal 'wrong'. 

When we don't, more and more stress eventually creates an classically conditioned state of associating us with stress.  Do we really want that.  Stop, Look, Adjust and Move.  Go back a step and explain again.  Be nice - which means, be precise (in the original dictionaries).  Be kind. 

Imagine a world where we assumed that everyone was trying to do the right thing, rather than everyone was out to get us.  It is the best lesson we can learn from animals. - when they fail to please us, look at what we are doing incorrectly

Comments

Post a Comment

Thank you for connecting💕

Popular posts from this blog

What is success?

Success is not giving a hoot.  If you can be a 45 year old cat woman playing in front of 3000 people, totally uninhibited, then you are succeeding.  Because if you are able to do that, you are in the present moment, not caring about what anybody else thinks.  Not worried about their judgements or how you think you should be coming across.  (ok, so I was a little worried, so not 100% successful, but I continue to strive to be free of this nonsence) When you have that presence of mind in front of animals, that is when you are succeeding. 
Post a Comment
Read more

Overwhelmed

Sometimes I spend time with people who see others in a different way to me. I am left feeling insecure in my intuition. Some believe that human beings are inherently bad. I prefer to see them as inherently good. With regard to people in relationship with animals, any poor relations, I see as misunderstandings or confused belief systems. I need to be able to trust my take on people. Because if I don't, there is no hope. If we don't inherently care, if we don't have that foundation to which we can return once we put our ego and greed aside, then there is no hope. People governed by their egos do three things when faced by challenges - 1. Keep doing the sam and expect a different result. 2. Dig in their heels and force the issue. 3. Give up and walk away with an excuse. All points refuse to acknowledge a problem which can be solved because it is a problem of our own making. So, when I look around and see litter, pollution, unethical care of humans and animals, corrupti...
2 comments
Read more

A Lesson in Surrender

  I always found the concept of surrender a cop out.  Something one would do if one was too weak to take on a situation.   So, when I found myself in a situation where I am unable to follow my passion in the most effective manner, I experienced great discomfort.  Speaking up was immediately taken as judgement.  Even though it was never intended as that.  The presumed judgement resulted in defence.  And the drama began, and unfolded.   Chasms and vindication ruled.  Frustration and finger pointing. What has this to do with animals?   For those of us that work with animals, they are like kids.  They sense how we feel.  Our moods affect them.  So, when this type of angst environment is created, the disturbance affects the creatures that we love. The lesson – stop the angst.  It is not worth upsetting the animals.  Nothing is.  So, surrender.  Not sure where this will go.  But I am here righ...
Post a Comment
Read more