The lessons are always present. 2014 taught me about looking closely at the effect I have on others. With animals we see it superficially, and intuitively. Sometimes in life when we understand the physiological mechanisms that are occurring, it helps us look at things from a different perspective. I have become aware of how classical conditioned stressors are a whole lot more powerful if an animal or person is subject to them when they are not at choice. We may think - being the scholarly animal people that we are that in our interactions we are providing choice - but this may not be the case if we are stuck in our heads. The moment we say "they know what I want", we are probably stepping into 'my way or the highway' mentality.
So, feel it. And in that moment if you feel you are asking too much - then the choice is gone. Back off - and doing that your relationship with the animal will be strengthened because you will be pairing his control with you. And truly allowing him to choose.